Kay Warder Parsons (1947-2009)

The last time I was there, we buried my grandfather. When the ceremony was over that day, mom joked that one day she would be buried there … and would be eaten by fire ants. I didn’t get bitten by one fire ant today, but we did bury my mom.

She would have been happy with the weather. It was a beautiful day in College Station, TX … not a cloud in the sky, a cool dry breeze, and plenty of shade underneath the oak trees of the Wellborn Cemetery. Friends and family were gathered for the third time in three days to honor my mother’s memory.

She died last Thursday after battling breast cancer for more than two years. Lisa said it best … we never heard mom complain. She fought, she prayed, she lived her life … but she never complained. She never felt sorry for herself.

When she received the final report from her oncologist in late April, her prognosis was days to weeks. Lisa, Claire and I drove to Lubbock the next day and spent the rest of the week with her. I am thankful for that time that we had to spend together. Not only because we were able to be with her before she died, but because I got to see how content she was.

Her faith was so strong that she was at peace with death. In fact, she was grateful that so many of her prayers had been answered. If mom had been scared of death, her passing would have been much harder for me. Her peace with death gives me peace.

I am sad. I have cried. I even caught myself looking for mom twice this weekend, but she wasn’t there. I’ve lost a great influence in my life and I will miss her.

She is gone, but I have a lot of great memories with my mom. I wrote some down when I learned that her time was short.

Mom was a bargain shopper and she loved to find a deal. She even knew when TJMaxx received their weekly shipments. She dragged me to that store on a weekly basis, just after the new shipment arrived, so that I could have name-brand clothes. In retrospect, I loved those trips … despite the elevator music.

Mom was a huge Texas Tech fan and my family always had season tickets to men’s basketball. Dad couldn’t go to Wednesday night games, so mom would take me to the game. If you never saw my mom at a Texas Tech athletic event, you missed a whole side of her. She was an animated fan and that always cracked me up. My favorite memory was when she and I watched the Tech men beat UT 128-125 in overtime at the old coliseum.

Mom traveled to England with me when I was a kid for a soccer tournament. We had played one or two games and I was playing terribly. I had lost all confidence in myself and it showed on the field. I remember her pulling me aside and “encouraging” me to get my crap together. I’ve never told anyone about that, but it was the only time that mom got onto me for sports. To her credit, I played much better after that.

Other fond memories include: cleaning the house every Saturday while listening to Bruce Springsteen or The Beach Boys, trips to Dairy Queen after school, making me listen to Michael Bolton in her car, hundreds of soccer games, listening to her read the Reader’s Digest true life story to us on car trips, and regular conversation at the dinner table.

We had some great times together! Love you Mom!





Mom’s memorial slide show is available at the following URL: http://www.memorialdesigners.net/

Random musings ... 3/18/09

I've been sitting at the "desk" in my hotel room trying to get motivated to do some work before I go to bed. Two hours and three cups of coffee later, no work has been done.

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Is it weird that I really like the bagpipes? Probably so ... I wasted about an hour tonight just looking for good bagpipe music on iTunes. I even joined a "Bagpipes are awesome" group on Facebook. By the way, there is a sweet YouTube video posted there.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3n9hbYwZZqk

Even as a child I can remember being enamered by them while on a family vacation in British Columbia. I don't have an Irish or Scottish ancestry that I'm aware of (British and German), but I could listen to the bagpipes all day.

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I'm glad that Lisa posted a new blog with pictures of Claire! I've been missing them both this week and it was great to see new pictures. My new desktop background is Claire in front of Grandmom and Pop-Pop's azaleas.

Hopefully I can get finished up quickly tomorrow so that I can catch an early flight home. If I can't get the earlier flight, then I'll miss Claire again because she'll be asleep before I get home.

I'm also anxious to see Lisa's pierced nose. I think that I'm going to like it, but I'm going to reserve judgement until I see it.

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Bed time.

Thoughts from Barack's Address to Congress

• How pathetic are the Congressmen/Congresswomen who arrived at 8AM to get an aisle seat so that they can get TV time?
• I like Joe Biden … he looks friendly
• I hate the rounds of applause. What a bunch of phony pricks. This is serious and they want to be cheerleaders.
• Energy/Healthcare/Education
• I’m sick of hearing about “inherited debt”
• Wind turbines and solar panels won’t even make a dent in the energy crisis
• McCain looks terrible!
• Pelosi should be shot (not seriously)
• I’m skeptical that the Gov will be able to adequately account for the spending of recovery funds. An effort this big takes a lot of planning, and there hasn’t been time.
• Auto loans/college loans/small business loans
• “responsible” people will be able to lower their payments
• “Banks will have more money to lend” … or to throw huge Oscars after parties!
• I keep hearing “accountability” … this is good
• Seriously people … sit down
• “Our job is to solve the problem” but I keep hearing about “inherited debt”
• “It’s not about helping banks, it’s about helping people” … great … MAKE THE BANKS LEND MONEY!
• Pelosi obviously doesn’t understand the tone of this speech. Smiling, waving at people, etc.
• Energy: I like the message of keeping technology here.
• Healthcare: I’m interested to hear the solution. I like the tone that reform must happen now.
• Education: nice … a goal. Highest ratio of college graduates to citizens by 2020.
• There’s the first “bipartisan” in the speech
• Nice message about parent responsibility
• Big cheer about not passing debt to our children from those who created it … followed by telling us that it was “debt we inherited” … that fits in nicely with the bipartisan rhetoric
• Man … this is a lot of big promises (Healthcare reform, Medicare reform, Social Security reform, new Energy policy, Education reform, end the Iraq war, defeat Al Qaeda in Afghanistan and Pakistan) I hope he has an all-world team and a time machine
• I like Hillary’s outfit … Pelosi’s is terrible
• Nice story about the Banker who gave away his $60M bonus
• Nice moment with the little girl who isn’t a “quitter”
• He gives a good message, but I’m still skeptical
• Maybe baby-steps are good …

Why I Don't Give Blood ...

Lisa is really good about giving blood when the opportunity presents itself. I, however, am not, but I have good reason. Reason that reared its head again this weekend.

When we bought our house, we inherited sliding glass doors on all the tubs. At the time the doors were simply an asthetic issue. When Claire came along, the doors became a problem at bath time and it was time for them to go.

Demolition is fun, and I was ready to get in there and start ripping the doors out. After a couple of issues with rusty screws, I made pretty short work of the demo and all I had left was to scrape away the remaining caulk.

With about three scrapes to go, my hand slipped down the scraping tool and it sliced my ring finger open. About 1.5 seconds later the blood started rushing out. For some reason my first reaction was to put my finger in my mouth (I guess it help prevent blood from getting everywhere).

I walked out into the hall and told Lisa that I cut myself. She asked if it was bad and it occurred to me that I had no idea how bad it was because my finger was in my mouth. I took it out and the blood gushed.

Off the the bathroom and I was trying to get a bandaid on. Not working, and the more of my blood that I saw, the higher my axiety level. Thankfully Lisa was much cooler under pressure and gave me a damp towel to apply pressure.

With pressure applied, I started down the hall to take a seat and the living room but didn't make it. I started to black out halfway down the hall, but was able to plop down in the entryway and gather myself.

Lisa came to check on me and was surprised to see me on the ground. I was literally dripping sweat, and had to change my shirt shortly after. She brought me a water and a wet rag for my neck and I finally settled down.

As far as cuts go, it's a pretty good one, but the severity of my reaction did not coincide with the severity of the injury and that's why I don't give blood.

If I did, I'd be sitting on the floor with a glass of spilled orange juice and a broken cookie.

25 Things About Me

I posted this on Facebook and thought I'd post it here, too. The idea is to post 25 random or interesting things about yourself. Here's mine ...

1) I love my family. Lisa is a great mother and wife, and Claire is my baby girl.

2) I was 60 pounds heavier about 5 years ago. I remember my turning point. I was driving home from work one afternoon and my belt was cutting into my gut. I was so sick and tired of being fat and uncomfortable that I resolved to lose the weight.

3) I really enjoy reading books from the business section. I recommend "Good to Great", "Built to Serve", and "Think Better."

4) I was an average student (at best) through the seventh grade. At the end of the year there was a board in the hall that listed all the "Top Students" and my name wasn't on it. It bothered me so much that I was named one of the top 15 students in 8th grade.

5) I'm very goal-oriented. When I make up my mind to do something ... I do it. I can thank my Mom for being a perfectionist, and my Dad for always saying "If something is worth doing, it's worth doing right."

6) Everything that I own has a "place."

7) I haven't consumed any alcohol in over a year.

8) I'm a huge Texas Tech fan ... especially football. I used to drag Lisa to watch spring practice when we were in college. I'm practically a walking encyclopedia of Texas Tech knowledge.

9) I can spot grammatical errors instantly. It's weird ...

10) In the last two years I have competed in two triathlons (1 sprint, 1 olympic), ran a half marathon, and a full marathon.

11) I noticed when I was about 6 years old that when I pet a fuzzy puppy, the roof of my mouth tickles.

12) I have a healthy fear of flying. I've gotten much better over the past few years, but I used to not let Lisa get up to go to the bathroom because it made me nervous.

13) I was an all region power lifter in the 198lb weight class my junior year in high school.

14) I sweat a lot ... my parents said that I was a sweaty baby, too. Sad.

15) I have a very dry, sarchastic, and whitty sense of humor.

16) Outside of work it takes me a while to warm up to people. At work I'm generally seen as very outgoing.

17) I have two large screws in my left knee from a football injury in high school. You can see the heads of the bolts under the skin.

18) I'm very good at impersonations and I pick up on other people's accents. However, I can't do Irish ... it always turns into Pirate for some reason.

19) I like to sing rap songs in a "white nerd" voice.

20) I have really wide feet.

21) I have a sweet dance that I do to the Ghostbusters theme song. I would recreate it, but I would have to have camouflage, swimming goggles and an old man hat... ask my dad or sister about that.

22) I had a small scholarship when I went to college. I lost it when I got a 1.3 the first semester.

23) I went to Alaska when I was a kid. I was chased by a moose, wrecked my bike into a boulder, and was made to go to bed while it was still bright outside. I'll never go back.

24) I drug Lisa all over Paris for our honeymoon until she said "This is my honeymoon, not bootcamp!" I let her go back to the hotel while I went out to see more of Paris. While alone, I saw my favorite thing in Paris ... Père Lachaise Cemetery. Then I got lost on the subway ... D'oh!

25) After watching Ace Ventura, I developed a habit of making faces in the mirror to see what I looked like. I still do it today ...

Claire's Belly Laugh

Claire was standing at the gate in her play room while I was making breakfast this morning. She likes to be startled, so I started jumping across the doorway. Here's the reaction ...

Tightening the Belt ...

Lisa and I are tightening our belts in 2009. Considering the current economic turmoil and the changes in our own financial environment over the last year, it's the responsible thing to do.

I downloaded the last two months of spending data from our bank and assigned each cost to a major category. Then I handed the computer over to Lisa and she performed all of the analytics (she knows her way around Excel!).

We are going to sit down today and establish a budget. At the end of each month, we will review our budget compared to our spending and set the next month's budget.

We have already purged some of our major non-essential bills (housecleaner, lawncare, internet service on cell phone, etc.). I have been taking my lunch to work and Lisa is going to make a weekly meal plan.

If you need a little kick in the pants to do the same, I would suggest reading "The Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey. He takes the hard line, but the book has some really good principles.

I'm really excited that we are starting to tell our money where to go, instead of wondering where it went!